This is a post that I really didnt think Id be posting so soon.
It’s been 6 months since my life fell apart and in that time Ive seen some dramatic changes. Ive moved towns, Ive bought a new flat, Ive started to find out what makes me tick and Ive been able to take control of my life for the first time in many years.
Those of you who have been following know that this has been a journey. One of the scariest parts for me about this journey is the thought of putting myself out there again. Which is why NOONE is more shocked than me that Ive met someone. Not only that they live literally down the road.
Now If I were to put together a wish list of my perfect date material it would be something along the following lines…
Great sense of humour – I need someone that can make me laugh till I wee a little!! They must also have a slightly evil sense of humour too.
Beautiful eyes – I need something to gaze into 🙂
Straight acting – now don’t @ me but its a personal preference. I am Gay but I don’t come across as gay and I just fancy people that sound and act like me.
A zest for life – Ive spent a long time of my life with someone that didn’t want to do anything. Whose Idea of fun was to watch TV and get stoned – and thats never been me and I want to spend time with someone who gets excited about stuff.
About my age – I want someone who has lived – someone with some experience and who understands when I make obscure 90s dance music references
I need to find them hot!! Im not talking about body beautiful or gorgeous looks but there needs to be something about them that makes me go weak at my knees. I spent 16 years of my life in a relationship with someone who I realise now I never found hot – I fancied him in the early years and I definitely loved him – but I never found him HOT.
Obviously they also need to find me hot – but we already know about my body and self confidence issues!!
So thats a relatively short list (lol) and I honestly thought I was gonna have to settle on something when dating.
Which is why when I got to know hot neighbour (thats what Im calling him for now) I realised that actually here was someone who had me howling in laughter, who shares lots of interests and has enough of his own that Im excited to learn about. Who wants to do things and who actually gets my warped sense of humour. It also doesn’t hurt matters that I think he is incredibly hot!! So when he asked if Id like to spend time with him I jumped at the chance.
One of the most surprising things about getting to know hot neighbour is the honesty. I promised myself when I split from my ex that there would be no lies and I’ve stuck to that. Hot neighbour is very similar and we have had some great conversations that I couldn’t imagine having in the past.
And as that has started to develop its been really good fun. Ive got over my initial fears about dating and Im finally living my life. The last couple of days we have been out on our bikes exploring the coast a little, we’ve eaten fish and chips on the beach we both drank too much and even cooked Chinese food together.
The ease of it all has really shocked me. Just the act of cooking with someone – with no pressure and no expectation is sooo much fun. I don’t think I have ever cooked with someone else, My Ex certainly couldn’t be bothered, and thats a nice new feeling.
Now Im under no delusions here. We have known each other 3 weeks and been dating for about 3 minutes so this is very new and we both come with some baggage. But all I know is I am really enjoying spending time with hot neighbour right now, it’s really easy and neither of us has to try to be something we aren’t. As for anything else, we both come with history and both get that each other are shaped by that so there really is no pressure to be anything other than in the moment and thats a wonderful feeling!!
The Unapologetic life of a Gay Divorcee 
So pleased for you and ‘hot neighbour.’ Sounds like you’re already having lots of fun with life and that you’re a great match. I look forward to hearing more about how it’s all going.
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